I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
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