I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
