were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
