We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
