and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
