I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
