Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize