do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Randomize
