i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
