my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
