If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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