she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
