his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Couch. On fire.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
