No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
