This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
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