he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
My vagina just recognized that song.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Randomize
