Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
