He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Randomize
