i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Randomize
