why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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