I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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