we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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