She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
