She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
