She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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