I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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