i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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