I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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