The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
