It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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