thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
