We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
So apparently I’m into choking now
tell me about the eggs
Randomize