I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
no, he came in my armpit
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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