I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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