At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
