your thong is hanging out like whoa
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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