Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I supernannyed him into submission
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
