are you still at the devil's house?
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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