dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize