he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Randomize
