But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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