I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
