3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Randomize
