I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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