They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
