i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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