glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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