I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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