So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
