What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize